SEX AND LOVE
Some of my more cynical and disheartened friends would deny that any relationship between the two exists. Some unfortunate people have made the mistake of using one as bait for the other, and have been bitterly disappointed. Most would agree that there is a relationship, but it is difficult to define, because it is always changing to suit the situation and the people involved.
Some people are quite happy to have sex for its own sake, and attach no other conditions to it. Emotionally detached sex, like a sport, or hobby, may be totally satisfying for some people. However, for many sex is still bound up in a whole load of emotional packaging, no matter how liberated we may like to believe we are as a society.
Sex can serve a very useful purpose in relationships. Two people can use a sexual relationship to express their affection and devotion to one another. It can be a wonderful thing.
However, having sex does not necessarily make the affection and devotion happen. There are many women who wants to believe it does. ‘If I have sex with him, he will love/like/go out with me.’ It may work, but it may not. Being loved/liked/gone out with for your other qualities, rather than simply for the fact that you own a vagina, may be more satisfying for you in the long run.
Problems can arise when two people have differing expectations of a sexual relationship. Unfortunately, when we are young and starting out, caution and common sense are the last things on our minds. We are anxious to find out more about this new thing called sex, and often end up tripping over ourselves in the rush. Again, at the risk of sounding like someone’s mum, it may be a good idea to have a think about it along the way.
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Tags: Women’s Health